It all started when I was six, and my mum had her clinic in Singapore. I used to dream of taking over her clinic when she retired, even though it was in the heart of the burmese community and I had no idea how to speak Burmese. I never thought of the small details, I just made up my mind to take over the clinic. Now, nine years later, I still want to be a doctor. I don't want to take over my mum's clinic anymore (we've moved to Melbourne, so we don't actually have the clinic anymore anyways), but instead, I want to look after kids, so I'm looking into specialising in Pediatrics. Anyways, moving back to my actual point. I have a whole plan set out, but my problem at the moment is that it hasn't sunk in yet. I know Medicine is a difficult course to get into, but I can't seem to make myself work for it. I want to. I want to start working so much harder, but I can't seem to. My brain and heart is screaming, "Do some work, Kim!" but my body just refuses to move, refuses to do what my brain is saying, refuses to do what I actually want to do.

I like plans. My whole life, I've always liked having a plan. An idea of what's going to happen. But recently, I've realised that no matter how much you plan, life just never goes according to plan. And I'm scared, terrified of that prospect. I've had this plan for over half my life, and if it doesn't go the direction I want it to, this is going to sound dramatic, but it's safe to say that my life is over. I've always been a very narrow minded person, especially over my future career. It's just something that's non-negotiable. I know what I want to be and I'm not changing it. Especially not now.

So now, my future is at stake, I know that well enough. My life is in jeopardy (melodramatic once again) because I'm getting so stressed out over it, and I just can't seem to comprehend why I'm not working hard enough. Oh, and to make things worse, I've been sick the past three days, so I'm really behind in all my work.

To conclude, I need to change now, or else I'm never going to get into the course I want to get into, and my life plan is going to fall apart. I really don't want that to happen.

It all started when I was six, and my mum had her clinic in Singapore. I used to dream of taking over her clinic when she retired, even though it was in the heart of the burmese community and I had no idea how to speak Burmese. I never thought of the small details, I just made up my mind to take over the clinic. Now, nine years later, I still want to be a doctor. I don't want to take over my mum's clinic anymore (we've moved to Melbourne, so we don't actually have the clinic anymore anyways), but instead, I want to look after kids, so I'm looking into specialising in Pediatrics. Anyways, moving back to my actual point. I have a whole plan set out, but my problem at the moment is that it hasn't sunk in yet. I know Medicine is a difficult course to get into, but I can't seem to make myself work for it. I want to. I want to start working so much harder, but I can't seem to. My brain and heart is screaming, "Do some work, Kim!" but my body just refuses to move, refuses to do what my brain is saying, refuses to do what I actually want to do.

I like plans. My whole life, I've always liked having a plan. An idea of what's going to happen. But recently, I've realised that no matter how much you plan, life just never goes according to plan. And I'm scared, terrified of that prospect. I've had this plan for over half my life, and if it doesn't go the direction I want it to, this is going to sound dramatic, but it's safe to say that my life is over. I've always been a very narrow minded person, especially over my future career. It's just something that's non-negotiable. I know what I want to be and I'm not changing it. Especially not now.

So now, my future is at stake, I know that well enough. My life is in jeopardy (melodramatic once again) because I'm getting so stressed out over it, and I just can't seem to comprehend why I'm not working hard enough. Oh, and to make things worse, I've been sick the past three days, so I'm really behind in all my work.

To conclude, I need to change now, or else I'm never going to get into the course I want to get into, and my life plan is going to fall apart. I really don't want that to happen.